“My son will have the name of santo / I want the most beautiful name”. The verses of the icon-song “Parents and Children”, Urban Legion, symbolize the will that parents have to learn more about their children’s emotions. Even before the baby is born, they embark on detailed planning, ranging from name to school choice.
Do not project your dreams on them
Who would not have liked to have been more popular; the first to be chosen for the football team or the most beautiful girl at school? We all wish we had suffered less and have been more admired. But remember: each one lives a unique story. So it is no use channeling to your child the expectation that he will be what you would have liked to have been.
Besides the universal impossibility of being 100% happy and loved all the time, take into account also that your child is someone else. He probably has different aptitudes and wants than his own. Often, children seem to be the narcissistic extension of their parents, “says psychologist and psychoanalyst Elizabeth Brandão, of São Paulo, a professor of Psychology at PUC-SP. This means that the child will not complement his life, much less compensate for it. She will have her life, with her own difficulties and achievements.
The child may feel pressured
Pressed to be an improved version of you, the child may fail. In this way, you will perceive this failure as a kind of disappointment for the parents. So, from an early age, try to make room for differences in tastes and goals in your family. Do not forget that raising a child is to follow the development of the life of another human being and assist him in this trajectory, not to mold someone to his liking.
Excessive expectations and over-protection and pampering often lead to an undesirable picture: the child can become a young man full of knowledge, however little able to relate in a group, dissatisfied and unhappy.
Accustomed to having everything at hand, he reacts badly to the difficulties intrinsic to life and living in society. Consequently, it does not develop the security and “waist play” necessary for personal satisfaction and professional success.
The ability to live, empathy and flexibility are characteristics that the professional world has been looking for. In a recent study, by one of the Best Nursery in Abu Dhabi, reported that 75% of U.S companies consider so-called “emotional intelligence” more important than the practical knowledge of their employees. It is no use, therefore, to invest in the hyper qualification of your child without, at the same time, guaranteeing him a solid emotional formation.
Thinking about it, do not lose sight of the emotions of your children.
Kazim Raza is a Digital Marketing Specialist @ Sofa Upholstery in Dubai. He love socializing and playing soccer. One of his target is to guide people how to earn a living via online marketing. There is a proper method to do this, and once you learn what that is, you become unstoppable.